In January 2010 I started my second attempt at writing a blog, and published my first post with WordPress.
I made a promise to myself – a commitment to keep writing in spite of the fact that I wasn’t comfortable doing so, and above all else to be honest and sincere in my writings. I wanted to grow my business, and to grow as an artists and on a personal level.
I’ve struggled. What to write, if I should write. The worst part was feeling as though I was making a fool out of myself. I still feel that way many days.
Then there are the days when I feel so completely happy and full of friendship from people I’ve never met in person. I have connected with some very interesting people many miles away by their honest and caring words to me through this marvelous internet thing.
The other week my blog hit 9000 reader views. In the blogging world, that isn’t much. In my world, it is huge and I just wanted to make sure that I said thank you to each of you. Whether you read each one or stop by occasionally I appreciate your time. Thank you for reading and commenting and making me feel safe for sharing and supporting me during my personal lows and cheering with me when I celebrate something good.
This past weekend I went on a retreat with a group of women. At one point I found myself in a very uncomfortable situation. I was physically and mentally trapped when I realized that one of the ladies next to me was reading my blog. She was reading my very private words in front of me and that was such a scary odd place to be.
On the other side a women was asking ooooh so many questions about my art. I felt the room getting smaller and smaller. I write these words, knowing they are going out there to be read by any unknown number of people, but it really made me very uneasy to have it done in front of me. I kept thinking about how I could just slide down in my chair, crawl under the table and slink out the door all in one smooth movement and no one would notice.
My little trapped in the headlights deer eyes kept darting across the room searching for the one person I knew would know how uncomfortable I was and to help me. She didn’t. She later told me she thought I looked completely at ease with my conversations and the situation.
I’m working on making some changes to my blog and I hope that you will pop in from time to time and see what I am up to. I’d like to hear from my readers and know about your life and what is happening with you too.
Until next time,